It is very difficult to find a game these days that is all that it’s cracked up to be.  Expensive marketing campaigns, ludicrous promises to the consumer, and excessive media coverage are all issues that are plaguing the industry and is likely the biggest reason why so many people experience  buyer’s remorse after rushing out to buy the next “big game”.  Games just do not live up to their hype anymore and rely on flashy graphics and high production value to sell themselves.  That said: Mass Effect 2 lives up to every single ounce of hype that it’s ever gotten.  Hands down.

This game is fantastic.  Visuals, sound, gameplay, and story all come together here to make one truly amazing work of art.  I don’t even know where to start.  I guess the best part of this game, if I were forced to choose one, would be the plot.  The story picks up where Mass Effect 1 left off, where a very large laser gets all-too-cozy with The Normandy’s  hull.  The ship is a complete loss, but you are eventually rescued from the vacuum of space by Cerberus, a controversial war machine of the human race, which has dedicated itself to chasing down The Collectors.  The Collectors are a race of malicious aliens seeking to amass a large pile of humans for some nefarious purpose.  Your job is to assemble a crew (on your NEW Normandy) to help you fight The Collectors and stop the invasion and abduction of various human colonies  while also discovering just what they’re doing with them.  I won’t spoil any details, but the story was one of the most dynamic and suspenseful pieces of writing I’ve seen in quite some time.

Gameplay is also wonderful.  The cover system is straight out of Gears of War, and it’s done very well.  Combat is heavy and well balanced.  I did find that my crew members would occasionally wander off out in the open, but I never had to revive them more times than was allotted to me (you get 3 res’s per mission).  Battles don’t just feel like battles, there is a clearly defined goal in each one and the arenas are so diverse that I rarely found myself getting bored.  The decision making that you do throughout the game makes even more of an effect on your overall outcome.  During the last mission (no spoilers ahead, I promise) you actually select your team leaders and assign roles to each person.  Who you select to do what determines how the mission comes out at the end.  Assigning the hulking Krogan to sneak around will likely result in your mission’s monumental failure, whilst assigning the stealth specialist to do so will end in success.  I wish this dynamic was presented more than once in the game but this is a small gripe.

Production value here is second to none.  This. Game. Is. Beautiful.  BioWare selected the Unreal III graphics engine to power this game, and by god does it look stunning.  It is quite possibly one of the prettiest things I’ve ever seen rendered real-time.  Voice acting is quite nice, although the issue with proper mouth movements is still present from the first game and can take away from the experience for some.  For me, this wasn’t a big issue and didn’t annoy me in the slightest. The pinnacle of production value for this game was likely when I landed on Ilian for the first time.  You arise out of the docks to see a living, breathing futuristic city straight out of a Sci-Fi novel.  My jaw could do nothing but drop to the floor.

Honestly, I could go on and on about just how FUCKING AWESOME this game is but you’ll never understand until you just go out there and grab it.  It is clear that BioWare learned from mistakes made in Mass Effect 1 and applied those lessons to the squeakquel.  It it, thus far, the best game I’ve played this year and is worth every SINGLE penny of the cost.  If you buy anything out of this last wave of games, get this.

“Vanitas” is the iPhone game developed by controversial games developer Tale of Tales.  By “controversial” I mean that you will either love their games, or hate them.  And since I buy each of their games when it comes out…I must be in the former category.  That said, I’m not one to praise without qualification, and I believe that their games often provide intriguing perspectives and rarely seen gameplay, which is outside of convention.  So the question is does “Vanitas” live up to their previous works?

The premise of “Vanitas” is this: “the best way to spend time is to waste it.”  And this sums up the game pretty well.  While you plan “Vanitas” your iPod is temporarily changed from a normal music player into a box with sliding lid (not literally, of course).  When you slide it open with the touch screen three random objects will be inside.  You can play around with them, see how their physics interact with each other, but there’s nothing you can really do with the items.  Then you can close the lid and open it up again for three new items.  The game works in stages, every five times you open the box a new stage begins and a few items change appearance.  Every three stages new items are added to the ones you find within, and there are a total of twelve stages.  Every time you open the box there’s a chance the items will be three of the same, and then you get a star on the box.

“Vanitas” is actually pretty appealing in it’s own way.  As I play it, I’m always just curious enough to see just what will be in the box next to put it down.  Yes, I’m well aware that the items don’t really do anything (unless I toy with them rolling them around and such), but there’s something addicting and often (dare I say) fun about playing with the toys and seeing their interaction.  I also have yet to receive a star, and for some odd video game-related reason, want one.

This is probably where “Vanitas” gets a little bit meta.  What the game sets up is a random chance that I will be rewarded (literally) with a gold star.  It is a well noted fact that gamers do nothing but work for stars as the famous statement goes: “It is always stars.”  This seems like a fairly effective commentary of goal based games and achievement hunting.  The other thing I discovered was that “Vanitas” is easy to compare to games like “Flight Control.”  Both are about repetition and pointless joy, rewarding you slightly (but not really) for coming back again and again.  It seems to be commentary on aspects of the medium which waste a lot of time, but provide no real rewards for the player’s mind.

The art style in “Vanitas” is lovely as one would expect.  It’s dark, but strangely beautiful.  The more the game is played the more objects change, often becoming ruined or darker.  Cherries will rot, you’ll find torn papers, and glass cracks.  There are a couple things I won’t mention though, as they can be a bit surprising or interesting when you find them on your own. Like most their games before, everything seems to have a kind of symbolism – most likely it is of wasted time.

All this aside, there is a complaint to make with the game.  The actual mechanics are somewhat unresponsive.  When moving the objects around they seem to be sluggish, and thin items are virtually impossible to pick up sometimes.  Some will mesh together and flop around, going through each other on occasion.  This never ruins the game, but it can sometimes make it unintentionally frustrating.  I assume this problem will be addressed with updates, but it’s very important to note.

“Vanitas” is a game definitely worth playing, and for 99 cents, there’s no reason not to get it.

You can find a link to the Tale of Tales site HERE.

And here’s a link to the Art History of Games website, for which “Vanitas” was commissioned.

Gimmicks are what tend to characterize each installment of Zelda, as you can probably tell by the names of almost every single game.  Each one has a new tools that will be pinnacle to gameplay from ocarinas to boats to staffs that control the seasons.  However the gimmick found in Phantom Hourglass was not exactly…good.  Increasing the length of time one has to go through the most annoying dungeon in the world is not a needed addition to the game, and Hourglass became excruciating around the mid-point.  Luckily, Spirit Tracks forgoes that nuisance for much more interesting gameplay elements: the Spirit Flute and Princess Zelda, herself.

The story is a fairly straightforward one, princess captured/save world.  But now it’s only the princess’s body that’s been held hostage which leaves her soul free to help out Link on her quest to rescue her.  Like Wind Waker and Hourglass the overworld is all about moving from point A to point B on a vehicle, this time though it’s a train.  Denying his usual warrior-hero look, Link starts in an adorable engineer’s uniform with a single desire to be a conductor.  Instead of being knighted, he is christened an engineer Zelda is essentially killed and turned into a ghost, where the two heroes have to go on an adventure to stop a demon king’s resurrection across the rails and return the princess to her body.

On the rails you’ll come across the same stock villages and races you’ve come to know and love, and there’s the familiar hub dungeon from the last game, but this time without constant retreading or timers.  You’ll also collect a variety of new and interesting tools to compliment your list of standard LoZ gadgets, like a snake whip and whirlwind (a fan that you use by blowing into the mic).  Probably the most unique of these items is the ocarina replacement for the game called the Spirit Flute that uses the DS’ controls surprisingly well.  You both blow into the mic while move from note to note with the stylus, and it is astonishingly fluid.

The other major addition to the game is Princess Zelda, who’s companionship makes for really interesting puzzle solving in the hub dungeon.  She will take control of a number of different phantoms (big armored baddies) and can be used to break through obstacles, carry Link across lava, and other interesting uses.  There are a few bad moments with her where she’ll get caught on something when you try and call her back to you and during fights with multiple powerful enemies where you’re fumbling between both characters, but thanks to being able to manually control her easily these are never deal breakers, and the hub dungeon levels end up as the most entertaining parts of the game.  I was always looking forward to returning the tower so Link could be joined by his companion for tag-team puzzle solving fun.

The train aspect of the game is charming but flawed.  The linear travel across an open world has never felt so linear or long and boring.  There are no straight paths to take from point A to B like in Phantom Hourglass, it’s always long and winding railroad tracks which eventually get really old.  On the other hand the scenery is lovely and I never got bored of tugging the rope signaling the horn or shooting the cannon at every rock along the way.  Those last two complements might sound really boring, but they were the only entertainment aside from annoying enemy attackers, so they were really the greatest saving graces I could find for the travel system.  Like I said: charming but flawed.

Aside from saying that the stylus controls are an improvement upon Phantom Hourglass there’s not much else to the gameplay.  It’s a Zelda game, they tend to be self-explanatory, but frequently a lot of fun.  For anyone that loves solid action adventure games, and especially those that love Zelda should go out and get a copy if they already haven’t.  It’s one of the best games I’ve played in the series and one of the best games I’ve played this year.

The original Super Monkey Ball for the iPhone was a less than stellar port with none of the original charm of the franchise, with bad controls, and 2D graphics it seemed like it should have been made for the Super Nintendo instead of the iPhone.  But now Sega has released a sequel in an attempt to redeem themselves for their horrible sin.  With improved graphics and gameplay, as well as additional minigames, the latest iPhone entry is a huge step in the right direction.

The Super Monkey Ball series has always been great if only in premise alone.  You control an ape (or maybe the plane that the monkey moves across) in a giant hamster ball, rolling across a dangerously open plane in the middle of a neon abyss with the intent of reaching a goal and then flying up into the air in euphoric bliss.  By tilting the map, you navigate your monkey through each level, and it shouldn’t be surprising that this concept would be perfect for the iPhone’s title controls.  Which is why it was so surprising that the first iPhone release was…well…crap.  Pure and simple.  The controls were clunky and never really did what you wanted them to do.  It was usually luck that would get you through each level.  Super Monkey Ball 2′s greatest improvement over the first is the tweaking of these controls.  With much more responsive movements, the once impossible levels are feasible, though in true Monkey Ball tradition success may be determined by the occasionally lucky run.

Super Monkey Ball 2′s controls can be frustrating, but if they weren’t there would be zero challenge, and in a game that is essentially physics based puzzles trial and error is always your best friend.  Some levels seem almost impossible after your second, third, fourth, and seventh failure, but that’s what makes the final victory so wonderful.  It keeps you yelling at the screen, screaming “No, no, no!” as you tip over the edge of the platform into the endless void below, but anyone that loves a good fight will get right back up and keep rolling.

The game is beautiful, loaded with the bright colors and adorable characters one would expect in the series, and stacking it up against the previous game reminds you of just how fantastic this sequel looks.  The monkey you control moves much more fluidly and is rendered in 3D unlike it’s predecessor.  And the backgrounds and platforms are a mix of bright colors that held create a positive and energetic mood.  This is doubly so when paired with the happy-go-lucky music that you’ll hear pumping through your headphones as you play.

Like any title controlled game, Super Monkey Ball 2 was not created with the public transit in mind.  The wiggling, squirming, and elbow jabbing you’ll do while trying to keep your monkey balanced will leave everyone on your flight much more tired and irritated than they normally would be.  But if you don’t mind looking like a fool, I suppose that won’t bother you much.  Usually you’ll have to be satisfied playing it at home, and there’s absolutely no way to play it lying down with the control’s layout.  If you don’t mind sitting up, and don’t mind reserving what really couldn’t be a portable game on a portable system for more private moments, than you’ll be just fine.

With multiplayer and minigames like Monkey Bowling (and two other games that are “coming soon”) it comes off as a very earnest attempt to make a quality game with a lot of replay value.  It feels like a game that could have been made for a forty dollar price on the DS, with equally strong content and graphics.  Ten dollars can come off a bit pricey on the iPhone market, and maybe it is by comparison with some other great titles on the platform, but it’s still a great deal and by far the cheapest, quality deal you’ll find for any Super Monkey Ball game.   For anyone that loves the series this is a must own, and for anyone casually thinking about picking it up, or just like fun games then this a strong recommendation.

I’ve finally gotten the chance to play Machinarium and in a world where adventure games are a rare breed, something in this genre has to be really special to be loved, or even noticed.  Luckily Amanita Design was up to the task in their latest title.  With a beautiful art style, comical and heartwarming characters, and complex yet manageable puzzles, Machinarium stands head and shoulders above other recent adventure game titles.

Machinarium is about a small and weak robot-child searching for a lost friend through an entirely mechanical city, and though the story is touching and brings you closer to the voiceless characters, the presentation is where the game truly shines.  The backgrounds contain both a hand painted and distopic presents that makes the world appear to be a crumbling mess of old architecture, barely being held together, and each of the robots looks like it was more assembled with old soup cans than advanced technology.  The combination of these aspects brings about a world that feels almost entirely hopeless, yet there is an innocent charm to be had.  Every time the player aids someone, their personalities shift from mournful inhabitants of an oppressive world to remarkably joyous.  Almost every act to benefit others provokes some kind of freedom of movement or music for the bedraggled, mechanical citizens.  Somehow the change in mood never seems contradictory to the original atmosphere created by the dark setting.  Instead, without change in palette, the world becomes slightly brighter.

From a gameplay perspective, Machinarium is almost as old-school as old-school can get.  You’ll walk around rubbing object A on surface B figuring out what goes where.  If you’re not doing that you’ll be working through fairly complex though traditional puzzles, like connecting points to create a star or moving sets of pegs to opposite sides of a board.  Though the A to B gameplay tends to work perfectly, the other puzzles can ocassionally be an exercise in extreme levels of frustration (“old-school”).  Luckily, there is a helpful hints section that gives less advice and more direct instructions on how to finish a puzzle or area, keeping you from getting stuck.  There is a short minigame in the fashion of a sidescrolling shooter that will be required before gaining access to the hints.  While it’s incredibly simple, once you’ve grinded your teeth down to the gums, it can be even more irritating to patiently sit through the slow moving minigame.

Other fun little diversions are a space invaders minigame and a overhead, low-graphics shooter through a dungeon maze.  These additions add Machinarium more layers of old-school gaming that a lot of us carry as fond memories.  The entirety of the gameplay could be considered a love letter to the past, but with a caring eye.  Thanks to the hint system the game won’t let itself become too difficult, it wants to be finished as it is mindful of the flaws that made old adventure games inaccessible.  The minigames tend to be easy and patient without genuine fear of failure, allowing the player to bask in nostalgia for a periods of time.  For as much referencing as Machinarium does, it never quite feels too nostalgic, like I said, it’s aware of the flaws from the past and tries to avoid those pitfalls.

While most adventure games try to skate by on their dialog driven wit, Machinarium refuses to play by the conventions that made titles like Monkey Island and Day of the Tentacle so successful.  While it thankfully avoids copying the humor of successful franchises it still manages to have a cute and comedic charm of its own.  With no dialog, all story aspects are told through thought bubbles, which somehow pulls out a heartwarming story in the classic point and click gameplay.  This adds another memorable and unique element to the experience.  It’ll be hard to forget the adorable robot-children after playing through of Machinarium.  For voiceless machines, that’s pretty impressive.

Machinarium is a great game that leaves very little to complain about once everything’s been finished.  The relatively short length is justified by its twenty dollar asking price and the frustration from the puzzles can be made up for with in-game instruction booklet’s helpful hints.  Then the beautiful scenery and lovable characters push the game from satisfying adventure to wonderful experience.  I probably wouldn’t advice everyone to buy this game though.  If you aren’t a fan of adventure games or the classic arcade/DOS eras of gaming than you’re best to stick with something else.  However, if you want something both classic and original then give in to the temptation to buy.  Machinarium doesn’t disappoint.

A demo and full version of Machinarium can be found on Steam and its website.

I’d like to start off by saying that Dan Houser is, in fact, the fucking man when it comes to modern-day video game conceptualization. That said, The Ballad of Gay Tony (TBoGT) is quite possibly the most satisfying gaming experiences I’ve had in years, and I’m a fairly tough critic when it comes to making statements of that nature.

“But, but Rob! What about the original story line?! Wasn’t that considered a masterpiece by just about every major gaming review site?” Yes, it was. But, for me, the original story seemed to be the classic “Go here, shoot this a lot. Now go here, chase this and kill it. Now find a hooker and beat her to a bloody pulp in the back alley and rob her of the money she so desparately needs to feed her two crack babies, deadbeat baby daddy, and overzealous heroin habit” gig that we’ve seen from GTA over and over again. Gay Tony tones that down quite a bit and adds a plethora of fresh elements to the slowly-decaying entertainment value that the GTA franchise has been experiencing over the past couple years due to a lack of originality (to me it’s becoming the Will Farrel of the gaming industry).

First things first, you play as Luis Lopez (that’s “Loo-ees, not Loo-is”) , a latin ex-convict-turned-club-manager by Gay Tony, the biggest club owner in LC. Tony is the boss, you’re the head muscle. What’s really cool about this is the relationship between Luis and Tony. They’re very close, but Luis is straight and Tony is quite gay. You’ll often find yourself not only as the head muscle but also playing the role of Tony’s mentor as you try to work things out with his bad decisions, boyfriends, drug habits, club incidents, etc. I honestly cannot say enough about the characterization in this episode. It’s spot-on. One of my biggest fears when Rockstar first announced Gay Tony is that we were going to see some flambouyant gay man prancing around Liberty being all happy, limp-wristed and pretending to be hardcore all the while. This was not the case, Tony is the perfect balance between amusing homo humor and serious club owner. Same is the case with Luis. His character is not the stereotypical latin gangster; He’s refined, classy, but will occasionally find himself a subject to his roots. I’m very happy that Rockstar has finally decided to grow up and make some original characters that don’t exploit their stereotypes for an entire storyline (a la CJ in GTA:SA).

GTA for me always has been and will be about gameplay, and that’s where this episode really shines. About 60% of the missions in TBoGT are completely original content. That’s right kids, Rockstar got off their lazy asses and actually planned some new missions. New vehicles (such as the rocket-pod-laiden Buzzard helicopter, the parachutes, the fast cars) yield new ways to shoot up and terrorize Liberty City, and Rockstar used the capabilities of these new items to their fullest in the missions. The club is also an integral part of this story, and the side missions that can be had here are pretty fun. Kicking people out of your club for pushing dope or getting a little too raunchy with the ladies can be quite entertaining. I won’t go into too much detail, but I can say that the final mission was the best GTA mission to date in my opinion.

The soundtrack additions are pure gold. Vladivostok radio has an entire half hour set of non-stop house music that is supposedly broadcast from the newly-opened Bahama Mama’s nightclub in Algonquin. If you like electro or house, the soundtrack alone is worth the purchase to me. Michael Gray, Eric Prydz, David Guetta, all are huge names in the genre that decided to make their appearance on the setlist. My only complaint is that the new house songs weren’t added to, say, ElectroSHOC (you know, the electro/house/techno station?), but the Russian pop station?! WTF Rockstar?! If there is any complaint I have here it’s that I have to sit through a half hour of Russian pop that I may or may not care for to get to the setlist that I like. All of this content should have been added to ElectroSHOC. But this is a minor gripe.

I’d also like to add a small snippet about the new environments in TBoGT before I sew my mouth shut. The club scene here is done perfectly. You walk into a club, the dancefloor is packed, lights everywhere, fog machines going. Luis descends to the main level and starts strutting around the joint. He walks up the the VIP lounge, where some of LC’s biggest celebs are enjoying a bottle (or twelve) of champagne. A drunk frat boy challenges you to a drinking competition (which you can actually partake in), but you decline, you’ve got bitches to fuck. You head back down to the main level and hit the dancefloor. There’s a girl eying you that looks pretty hot so you start to bust a move. She’s interested, so she decides to get a bit closer. You two dance for a few minutes before she decides to take you by the hand to the women’s restroom where you two ravage each other in the stall next to the sorority girl puking out the 5 gallons of Everclear that she just ingested at the bar. You head out quietly back to the floor. Some idiot starts talkin trash about you while you’re walkin through. You pull out yo nine and bussacap in his ass. Mass pandemonium ensues. Suddenly the 60-70 people that were in the club stampede for the door in complete panic while you pump another 30 rounds into his head. That’ll show ‘em. You finish off the lame security that the owner hired and you walk outside. Three cruisers and a crowd of people are standing outside in total disbelief, the girls clutching their boyfriends for what little protection that shell of a man can offer at a time like this. You get the idea, the club environments are absolutely perfect.

As I said previously, Gay Tony was the most satisfying gaming experience I’ve had in years. From the soundtrack, to the missions, to the environments, it’s all top-notch production. I won’t say that it’s perfect, but it’s very, very damn close. If you pick up anything this month, get this. Totally worth the 1600 MS points.

Lots of big gay steaming bear love to Kotaku for the screenies!

There really is only one truly satisfying way to describe Scarygirl…FREE!

Let’s imagine you love Super Mario games and Nintendo announced that they were gonna release a short sidescrolling 2D Mario game, it was only gonna be about an hour long, but it would be the same fun mechanics that we’re all used to in Mario.  The catch is, they’re giving it away for free!!!  That, my friend, is what Scarygirl is all about.  It’s a fun 2D platforming adventure game that builds itself on familiar and simple gameplay, making it easy to pick up and oh-so-much fun to play.

Yet, Scarygirl kind of goes above and beyond the traditional freeware game.  Instead of making the usually platformer the nice folks at Touch My Pixel said, “No!  We won’t be happy releasing a good platformer.  We’re gonna release a good everything!”  And they did.  Aquatic levels, a timed racing level, boss fights, pie fights, puzzle platforming, Scarygirl does it all.  And I’ll admit, none of it is the best thing in the world.  But, 1. It’s free!  and 2. When you combine all these good aspects of different genres, it makes a great game.

The story in Scarygirl, is really not too existent.  The real premise of the game is play and have fun.  Though depending on what I chose to do in the story left me surprised by the inclusion of different paths to follow at a point, leading me to this motherfucker:

Leaving me curious about what the alternative was.  So, as we all know multiple paths equals multiple plays, and I think that’s what these makers wanted to create.  A game you’ll want to play more than once.

At the end of Scarygirl, they suggest that more levels will be on the way (obviously for free) and out of the kindness of their hearts they decide to give the player some neat wallpaper for winning…FOR FREE!  I havin’ a free overload here, children!  Some games you pay 60 bucks for on console want you to pay them extra cash for wallpaper, but Scarygirl gives you 5 pics just for giggles.  Soooo, in the spirit of sharing I have created a 72PC wallpaper that any fan would be proud to show off on his computer, and you can all have it for free.  Enjoy!!!

(Note: the following picture is REALLY not meant to be viewed by those without a sense of humor)

The Path is a “horror adventure” game by developer Tale of Tales that acts as a retelling of Little Red Riding Hood set in modern times.  With absolutely no combat and a plethora of exploration this game definitely caries the indie torch.  But while there’s a lot to be admired about The Path, it occasionally sink into old video game cliches.

I’ve been looking forward to this game’s release for a little while now, but I can’t whole-heartedly say that it’s completely met my expectations.  This is mostly because The Path is trying harder than previous Tale of Tales entries to be like all the other games.  Item collection and a grade at the end for “how well you did” are typical cliches in the video gaming world, and definitely two of my least favorite.  While trying to gain a larger audience the developers of The Path have sunk to this level from their non-traditional origins.

I don’t use this lightly, because it’s a dirty word that should almost never be uttered, but The Path is (cover your children’s ears) pretentious.  The first sign is the game’s main objective “Don’t wander from the path.”  Well, you have to wander from the path or else you “fail.”  Because of that dumb grading system the only way you can actually “succeed” is by frolicking off into the wilderness, meeting a stranger, letting your little girl get raped, and then shuffling to granny’s pad a dramatized wreck.  The aforementioned pretension comes from The Path’s attempt to send out some sort of message about “forging your own path” or “making your own rules,” but I’m not sure that’s really what it’s about, because if I get raped in the end I’d be happier not wandering too far off.  The letter grade at the end of a play through is a tell-tail sign of generic, unoriginal thinking.  To put it another way, The Path tries hard to be smarter than it actually is.

A slow moving gameplay should alienate all but the most patient players, but there’s nothing wrong with patience.  The incredibly slow pace of the little girls can be exchanged for running while the camera shifts to an awkward overhead view, so the game really does want player’s to take things slow.  The environment is dark and mysterious, and fairly interesting to explore.  Music is creepy, making one dread every step they take away from grandma’s house.  So exploring the scary woods has just the right atmosphere to keep the player looking around nervously, while still intrigued.

The two biggest highlights of The Path are grandma’s house and the “wolves.”  The wolves are the people you’ll run into out in the forest, and at least every time I’ve met one it ended badly.  They’re intriguing, scary, and sometimes a little bit too creepy (i.e. don’t take cigarettes from that nice, handsome boy).  That stupid grade at the end of the game aside, the fun really does come from frolicking off into the wilderness, meeting a stranger, letting your little girl get raped and then shuffling to granny’s pad a dramatized wreck.  Then inside of grandma’s house the camera moves to first person and no matter what you press you’ll keep going forward.  This gives a fantastic feeling of helplessness.  And whatever fate you meet decides what grandma’s house will look like on the inside, and sometimes where you’ll go inside the house.

While The Path is an interesting concept and a unique play, it feels like Tale of Tales’ sell-out game.  So hopefully their next release will be a first person shooter with bullet time (OH BOY!).  But, even with all it’s weaknesses The Path is a lot more compelling than 90% of what’s out there.

Ten dollars on Steam is all it takes to get a copy of this game, and I think whether it’s worth buying is largely up to the kind of person you are.  If you love video games as a potential art form and have a lot of patience, I’m going to most certainly recommend it.  If you are the kind of person that just wants to have fun blasting the heads of baddies, please oh please do not buy.

A Final Thought: I would like to see more games trying to be daring and different, instead of seeing a company known for being daring and different trying to make something more like all the other games.

Oh, and Final Final Thought: You don’t always get raped.  Just sometimes…

If you’re a fan of the Fall of Troy, you’ve probably heard their Ghostship demos, and those demos might be a big reason that you enjoy them so much. Well, that’s right, they FINALLY finished the album. They’ve been working on these songs for five years, polishing and nurturing them. You might think they look like just another band, but this three piece is different. They’ve put together a concept album that would make Rush proud.

Instead of reviewing songs like I want to, I’m going to cover different points of the album.

Vocals- I’ve been reading that some people don’t like the new vocals for these tracks. I don’t know about you, but I like it when people only scream when necessary. Oh? You’re a indiefuck scene asshole that only likes “post-punk” and “scene metal” so you like Underoath and their “screams”? Are they xxxhxcxxx? Do you like it in your butt?
The Fall of Troy is known for screaming a good bit in their songs, but the way they handle it on POTH is different. Thom and Frank sing and throw the occasional screech of death. Franks vocals work well with Thoms. (Frank used to be a lead singer/guitarist for Of Stalwart Fads I think, so he’s had his experience). Thom does better than he has done on any album, but the best vocals on the album are not his. Check out 2:25 on Chapter II. Yea- that’s the singer from Schoolyard Heroes, longtime friends of TFOT. She brings the intensity up to 11 with her operatic voice.

Lyrics/Story- All you need to know is that the lyrics are solid, and the story is crazy. It is about a group sailing when a Ghostship attacks, and at some point a demon enters Thoms head. Shit goes haywire. What is odd is that the lyrics even hold up when they go into a spoken word poetry section read by Thom’s girlfriend. “In the darkness of your mind, I’ll stand by your side and remove all your fear. I’ll eat you alive my dear.” Most spoken parts in songs sound cheesy (check out The Necromancer by Rush, you’ll lol despite it being a good song).

Guitar- Fuck me sideways. I’m really not even going to talk about this. Seriously. Insane. Insane. Insane. This CD has some quiet guitar parts that would make Dragonforce shake in their boots. Listen to this with headphones to get the full effect.

Bass- Frank has improved the quality of bass playing on this album. As simple and generic as that sentence is, it is fully true. And since he’s black, he obviously is good. (YAY RACISM!) But to be honest, Frank actually worked with and changed up some stuff occasionally, BUT they turned him down way too low in the mix. A little bit more volume would help, but still solid.

Drums- Second biggest improvement from vocals. In the four year time from the demos, Andrew has improved his playing immensely. Just check out the drum solo at the end of Part III. His work with Frank is better than it was with Ward’s, sometimes playing a more jazz style than punk with their bass and bass drum working together, which is how it should be in music.

Interludes- Trippy, intense, and fitting. At some point it kinda sounds a little bit like a solo Omar album…

Pros- All of the above
Cons- Franks bass turned down too low, and might be too crazy for you if you’re a wuss or you like shitty music.

No need to actually make this review any longer. Get this fucking album now. They only made 3000 copes to sell though. And if you missed out on the preorder (which sold out), and you cant make it to the west coast for their tour with Number Twelve Looks Like You (jazz fusion metal), then you gotta download this baby. But TFOT supports that, so who cares?

On a side note, go see these guys live. Did you think Rock and Roll was dead? (If you say that it isn’t dead, and that GH and RB revive it, just remember that Miley Cyrus likes Guitar Hero. Those games are ruining rock as we know it with the Jonas Brothers.) Fuck no! Thomas Erak is THE definition of rockstar. You might hear him playing something and think, “how the hell does he do that?” But then you realize he is singing at the same time. Then you see him live, watch him get a concussion on the first song, and then he plays an hour set anyway inside a 125 degree building, all the while jumping into the crowd and flailing around every single song… and he still manages to get many many hot chicks despite smelling and sweating more than anyone in the area. Not to mention, the band is very real, and will even do drugs with you if you bring them…

Tonight, we at 72PC went on a field trip to go see Max Payne the Movie. It was awful, but I’m not gonna go into details here… Lets just say I was pissed. Give this minicast a go, it runs about a half hour. SPOILERS ARE IN HERE! So don’t bitch and whine about it, you’ve been warned. Check it out!

72 Pin Connector Podcast: Minicast 004 – Max Payne Movie Review