What a wonderful staple of my childhood. The first time I ever had the chance to play SMW was at a Big Bear. Yeah, remember that grocery store chain that bit the dust years ago? They had a SNES in a little section for parents to drop their kids off when they drove them crazy (I fell fittingly into this category). Being a Sega child, I only had a couple friends who owned a Super Nintendo so I clung to that SNES at Big Bear. Kids wanting their turn got the silent treatment because there was no way I was letting go. Normally, I wasn’t that kid… but this was Super Fuckin’ Mario Fuckin’ World.
Christmas united me with this classic thanks to the glory of the Virtual Console. I purchased this and Donkey Kong Country 2 (which Chad should probably review before I get to it first… duh duh DUUUUUUUH!).
Where to begin… SMW was the pinnacle of the 2D Mario experience on the old school console. Yoshi came onto the scene, control over flight became amiable with the cape, not to mention you get to rehash the joy of decimating the Koopa Kids. Fuck those little bastards… literally, they’re bastards. Where’s the mother? Bowser would be a horrible father and an even worse single father. The only logical explanation is that Bowser got that Peach punanny on 8 occasions. What a whore.
See, total whore.
How do you think she can pull all of those turnips out of her dress? You guessed right, she’s got a gaping vagine… it looks like a pink hot tub…
Getting sidetracked…
SMW excelled at making cool looking environments
Welcome to Dinosaur Island. Those numbers you see are the rubble of castles guarded by a Koopa Kid. Your mission is to save the stolen Yoshis from these castles. Technically, you can beat the game without doing all that but then you’d be a pussy. Either that or you’re going for a speed run, then I guess I can understand that… IF you beat the world record.
For those who like a little spook every once in awhile in their adventure, there are also Ghost Houses along the way.
Home of the Boo in varied forms:
If you’ve never had to deal with a Boo, it’s quite simple. Just look at them and they quit moving. Either out of fear or shyness… the irony is palpable. Sometimes this tactic doesn’t work, hope you’re good at dodging.
Super Mario World is a KEY game for any avid gamer. It’s a classic that I still hear talk of to this day. I have never heard an ill word said in regard to it and probably never will. I’d assume the only people who don’t have good things to say about it didn’t make it through. Which is sad because the boss battle with Bowser is one of the most entertaining battles I’ve been a part of. It’s just fun, and you get to crack Bowser on the head with Mechakoopas! How does that not spell out fun!?
All of the boss battles are fun, not that I think about it.
If you haven’t played it. If you have, play it again and smile constantly.
